Have you ever tried to have sex or masturbate without using a good personal lubricant? I have and it wasn’t a good experience at all. According to most sexual health experts, engaging in any type of sex act without the right amount of moisture can cause serious problems including pain, irritation, skin rashes, allergic reactions and even bladder infections. You don’t have to convince many people to use lube for an improved sex session, but a lot of people need coaxing when it comes to using flavored lubricants. I don’t quite know why that is, but maybe it’s because they fear the flavor will be disgusting. And while many brands are notorious for producing distasteful products, it’s important to realize that they’re not all made the same.
Having tried countless lubes, I tend to lean more towards the kinds that can pull double duty on my partner’s booty. High-quality flavored lubes provide the same great skin protection as a standard lubricant but they have an extra feature that gives them a lot more versatility. In other words, you get properly slip and slide while also giving some serious lip service without triggering your gag reflex. Of course, none of that is possible when the product you’re using isn’t worth the bottle its contained in. But how do you tell a difference between the good, the bad and the nasty when you can’t try before you buy? You ask someone like me for their opinion, that’s how.
I recently got my hands on a bottle of the Crazy Girl brand’s Pink Cupcake lubricating gel and I lived to fight another day. And while I can’t say it was the best thing I ever tasted or tried, it certainly got my attention and the attention of every partner I encountered after its purchase. An ex told me all about it when slamming me for not performing oral sex enough throughout the course of our relationship. So, I sat out to prove him wrong by gobbling up as many penises as I possibly could. I needed a flavored lube badly, so I picked up the only thing I could think of. But before I tell you all about my kinky experiences, let me start by explaining exactly what it is I’m talking about here.
What Is Crazy Girl Pink Cupcake Lube?
Basically, the Crazy Girl brand is targeted towards adventurous females who love to be sexy and lustful whether with or without a partner. Their Pink Cupcake lube, however, paints a very different picture because it inspires couples to play in ways they’ve never done before. By slathering your lover’s genitals (or other body parts) with a little PC lube, you turn an otherwise dulled out experience into something you can both enjoy. Designed to invite better foreplay while adding some excitement into the mix, this unique personal lubricant is made to be safe for every body type and sex act imaginable with a smooth finish and minimal aftertaste.
The Main Features
The Pink Cupcake lube by Crazy Girl has a lot more to offer than just a unique flavor that’s appealing to all pallets. It’s actually a water-soluble, water-based personal lubricant that’s made in a such a way that it has numerous applications. In addition to being gentle on the skin and compatible with almost all sex toys on the market, this lube is also paraben and sulfate free, meaning it most likely won’t cause skin irritation or an allergic reaction when used as intended. And if that wasn’t enough to get you excited, it was made right here in the good old U.S. of A and never utilized any sort of animal testing in its development.
Despite its extremely sweet taste, PC is sugar free and gets its flavor from a honey extract (careful if you’re allergic). The product features a proprietary formula that makes it somewhat sticky but non-greasy nevertheless. It won’t ever stain your clothing or bedding and it provides a smooth and delicious taste while also warming slightly on contact for an improved sensation. Crazy Girl may not notorious for producing couples-friendly products yet, but I have a feeling this stuff is going to put them on the map. It makes giving AND receiving oral sex an enjoyable experience – something few flavored lubes can actually claim.
What Comes in the Box?
When you buy a bottle of lube you shouldn’t expect to get much else in the box with it. Sometimes, a manufacturer will be really nice and slip a condom or some sex toy cleaner inside but it’s usually just a sample and it’s almost always included as a market ploy to get consumers to buy more shit. You don’t need it, which means you should be concentrating on things like the packaging and the size/price ratio of the product in question. Hands-down, the Crazy Girl Pink Cupcake lube is one of the smallest bottles I’ve ever seen. However, it’s boxed up nicely and could even assimilate into a chick’s makeup stash without anyone ever noticing. You don’t get much else besides the lube though, unless you count the container that could (maybe) double as a secret storage compartment in a pinch.
The Experience
As a professional pervert, I try not to get my hopes too high when trying a new pleasure product or accessory. I had heard about the Crazy Girl Pink Cupcake lube from a girlfriend of mine and she even showed me the bottle one afternoon while we were leaving the gym. It looked like a container of some cute tanning lotion or perfume, which immediately made me interested. I like to get kinky and I prefer to do so on a whim, but carrying around a huge bottle of lube can become difficult to explain. The tininess of the bottle may been off-putting to some, but I thought it added to the product’s overall appeal (especially since it seems to be marketed towards handbag-toting females).
Getting my own bottle was easy – a quick search online and a few taps on my keyboard, about three days of waiting and then another two days of preparation (my partner and I have conflicting schedules). Once received and opened, we both started exploring all of its “features.” The first thing I noticed was the lack of chemical small. Instead, it had a sweet and inviting aroma that made me want to eat it. Upon tasting it, I knew it was going to be a delicious experience for us both. I might also add that I hadn’t ever given my man head until that night. You see what I’m saying?
We both had mixed emotions about the lube’s consistency. It was thin and smooth but once it started to dry it became somewhat sticky. On the bright side, the stickiness improved the friction of my BJ (allowing me to rest my jaws for a bit) and it also added to the sexy sounds we were making. Overall, it’s a tasty product that gets carried with me everywhere because 1) it’s small enough to fit in my pocket, 2) it’s tasty and healthy enough to use frequently, and 3) I’m not obsessed with sucking my man’s dick.
The Ups and Downs
I heard one person my entire life say that a product was perfect and that person was higher than a kite when they said it. We all know there’s no such thing, especially when it comes to something as personal as lube. And while we’d like to think that the market has quality and effectiveness cornered, it’s simply not the case (yet). For now, we’ll have to take the good with the bad when shopping for lubrication. As for the Pink Cupcake lube by the Crazy Girl brand, it has a few of its own ups and downs you need to become aware of ASAP. Here’s what you need to know before spending any money:
PROS
- Water-based for enhanced versatility (especially with sex toys)
- Tastes eerily similar to a real cupcake
- Comes in a convenient pump bottle
- Thin, luxurious texture
- Easy to wipe and/or wash off
- Does not stain clothing or bedding
- Made from skin-safe materials
CONS
- Could be too sweet for some
- Somewhat small container for the price
- Relatively sticky consistency
The Takeaway
While the Crazy Girl Pink Cupcake lube might be too sweet for some people or be contained in too small of a bottle for others, the tastiness is undeniable and the silkiness is noticeable immediately. I could have stood for a little less stickiness, but that’s sort of what happens when you eat cake all night so I’m not trippin’. My partner certainly seemed to enjoy my reaction to it, and our bed sheets didn’t have to be thrown away afterwards (like they would have if we incorporated real food). I won’t claim that it’s the best tasting lube on the planet, but I will admit to it being one of my current favorites. It’s smooth and provides a distinct enough flavor to counteract the taste of your partner’s unwashed balls. And I don’t know about you, but that’s worth a million bucks to me.
