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I know what you’re thinking: “How can anyone tell whether a lubricant is decent or not when they can’t even try it before they buy it?” And since reviews are so subjective to the opinions of the people giving them, it’s difficult to determine what’s worth it or not even when you do tons of fervent research. My quest for the perfect lube has been ongoing since college, yet I have never found a perfect product. It’s simply not possible, but I’m always open for suggestions. In fact, I recently got one from a friend of mine who’s all about the environment and constantly dogging me about my contribution to the planet’s carbon footprint or something like that. And while I’m not a tree hugger by any means, I figured it wouldn’t hurt to try something new and do my part to save the planet at the same time.
He recommended something I’d never heard of that was part of the Wicked Sensual Care Collection (which was a brand I wasn’t very familiar with). Afraid to disappoint him but also trying to avoid wasting my money I asked for some more information, at which time he gave me the low-down on the product’s many “amazing” properties. Obviously, I had to try it out so he would know I respected his opinion and took it seriously. Also, I wanted to have sex with him later and I needed some of his favorite lube on deck just in case things went as planned. So, were my expectations met or did this lube leave me hanging in all the wrong ways? Well, let’s make sure you know what I’m talking about first.
What is Wicked Aqua Candy Apple Lube?
The Wicked Sensual Care Collection is a company that was developed exclusively as a skincare line by Carrie Smith. She’s a huge backer for anti-cruelty legislation and prides herself on making products that are 100% vegan and PETA certified. Within her luxurious line of personal lubricants, complexion products and performance enhancers is the Wicked Aqua Candy Apple lube we’re currently discussing. It hasn’t exactly won a bunch of industry awards (yet), but it has become the talk of the town in the underground because of its ability to enhance sexual sensations while improving the condition of the skin and reducing the user’s carbon footprint at the same time. Talk about a multi-tasker…
The Main Features
This stuff is packed full of so-called “features” that make it ideal for all sorts of users. It’s usually a go-to product for eco-conscious individuals who enjoy oral sex, but because of its water-based formula it can be used for almost any activity you can dream up – from blowjobs and intercourse to sex toy play and masturbation. The ingredients were never tested on animals and contain zero parabens or glycerin. Plus, the silky-smooth texture is completely hypoallergenic (meaning it won’t ever cause a rash or an allergic reaction regardless of your skin type) and it’s made to be extra easy to clean up when you’re all done too. The contents within a bottle of Wicked Aqua Candy Apple lube will never stain your clothes or bedding either, giving you and/or your partner(s) the freedom to incorporate things like lingerie, sex furniture and sensual sheets without worrying about ruining something. And by the way, the bottle is sleek and black with a convenient pump-style nozzle for improved user-friendliness (and improved discretion just in case you don’t have a bunch of space for storage).
What Comes in the Box?
When it comes to lube, you usually don’t get a lot in the box with the bottle. So, it’s important to examine the container itself and see if it’s worth the money you’re expected to pay for it. The Wicked Aqua brand is notorious for being extremely generous with their product quantities, although some of their products lack quality because of it. As for their Candy Apple lube, it’s a great representation of what can happen when a manufacturer finally gets a formula right. Not only is it sold in a massive 4 ounce bottle but it’s also one of the most popular lubricant brands in the industry because of its smooth, aromatic properties – both of which are certainly testaments to the value of something having a good balance between quality and quantity.
No two lubricants are alike, remember? That means a person’s experience will vary depending on which product they use. I learned that the hard way, which is why I think this part is so important. With that said, I have the same basic criteria with which I judge all flavored lubricants because that’s what makes the most sense (plus, that’s what’s fair and objective). So, here’s my experience with each of them so you can get a better idea of what you’re dealing with here:
- The Taste
Okay, so it’s nowhere near the actual taste of a candy apple, at least not in the sense that you and I would think of one. I imagine a caramel-covered Granny Smith apple with some nuts on top. What I got, however, was a super synthetic and almost plastic-like flavor that was somewhat off-putting at first. Once I got over the fact that I didn’t get realism with my purchase, I actually started preferring the taste. So basically, it had a poor start but a decent finish – like me when I’m having sex with my partner first thing in the morning.
- The Texture
I liked how silky and smooth this lubricant was when it touched my skin. I’d just like to say to all the lube manufacturers out there who insist on using non-eco-friendly ingredients to make their so-called “high-quality” products: It’s possible to create something just as amazing as your stuff without killing the environment in the process. I’m even willing to overlook the relatively poor rendition of a candy apple because of the fact that the makers are so in tune with the today’s environmental issues. In fact, that’s one of the main reasons why I bought this stuff to begin with, so for it to not be a tacky, sticky mess is an enormous relief to my conscience and my pocketbook.
- The Sensation
Speaking of silky and smooth, the sensations that my partner and I experienced because of this lube were incredible. It provided just enough slickness between our bodies to prevent chaffing but it wasn’t so thick that the sensations were reduced too much – the perfect balance if you ask me (which you did). And since the aroma of the product is so strong, it actually provides a fuller-bodied feeling that includes a change in your perception (at least in terms of smell).
- The Container
This stuff comes in a medium-sized plastic bottle with a twistable, closable pump. The container is black and sleek too, so it can be stored on your nightstand without calling too much attention to your kinky side.
- The Ingredients
As one of the most natural water-based lubricant on the market, Wicked Aqua Candy Apple lube contains ingredients that are not only safe for all skin types but also compatible with sex toy materials and condoms. The ingredients work together to create a luxurious feeling on contact while also contributing positively to our current environmental woes which, by the way, we should care about at least a little (and I didn’t put that in there just to help my odds of getting laid).
The Ups and Downs
Not all lubes are made the same, which means some of them are better than others. However, the discrepancy doesn’t make any of them perfect. We’ve all got to learn how to take the good with the bad when it comes to selecting personal lubrication. And while the Candy Apple lube by Wicked Aqua is a top seller for many good reasons, it still has a few ups and downs that need to be carefully considered before it’s used. Here are the things you need to know before spending any money:
- Fresh aroma
- Tangy and playful candy taste
- Large size bottle for the price
- Convenient pump for easier access to contents
- Water-based formula compatible with all sex toy materials
- Made with eco-friendly, skin-safe ingredients
- Does not become sticky when it dries
- May not taste like a candy apple to all pallets
- Not as long-lasting as some flavored lubes
This apple is more wicked than the one in the Garden of Eden. While it may not be the taste everyone is looking for, this luxury-grade lube is both environmentally friendly and surprisingly yummy if you’re into that whole sweet-and-sour thing or like exploring different avenues of your pallet. Created by an eco-conscious manufacturer with a unique take on the human tongue, Wicked Aqua Candy Apple lube is 100% vegan, never tested on animals, and always ready to do in its conveniently designed pump-style bottle. Made with all natural, organic ingredients that are both safe if swallowed and compatible with sex toys and condoms, this non-sticky and fresh smelling flavored lube is a terrific choice for someone looking to add a little reliable variety to the mix.