Counseling Services

Help Provided
Our counselors are licensed Christian therapists who deal with general and issue-specific counseling needs. They are qualified to handle issues related to sex addiction, pornography, abuse, marital problems, and issues involving children, but also handle issues unrelated to sexuality.

Free: Our counselors are available to provide a one-time counseling service at no cost to you.

Long-term help: Our staff may also be able to help you find a professional counselor in your region who can provide more in-depth and long-term help. Over the past 25 years, Focus on the Family has developed a nationwide Christian counseling referral system. All the counselors on the referral list have gone through an extensive screening process. (Service limited to the United States and select regions in Canada.)


  • Focus on the Family will not call another person on your behalf (i.e. your spouse or child).
  • All phone consultations are kept confidential except in those few situations that licensed counselors are not legally able to do so.

Counseling Approach
Focus on the Family does not advocate one particular treatment method over any other, but does maintain that a healthy spiritual life is essential to any long-term recovery. Focus on the Family and Pure Intimacy resources are available to anyone regardless of age, race, gender, faith or creed, but we do approach life and its struggles from a Christian worldview. We would be cautious about any therapy or treatment that did not adequately account for the role of faith in a person’s mental and emotional well-being.

Contact Us
You can reach us by calling (719) 531-3400 weekdays 9:00 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. (MST). Ask for the Counseling Department at extension 7700 and mention that you were referred through the Pure Intimacy Web site.

When you call, please ask for our counselor’s assistant. If a counselor is not immediately available, you can leave your contact information and a counselor will call you back as soon as possible.

Online referral: You can also request assistance online by completing a referral request form (provided by Focus on the Family). Our staff will be in touch with you in as timely a manner as possible.

Frequently Asked Questions

Questions to ask yourself:

  • Have you spent a great deal of time during the past few weeks thinking and worrying about this issue; are you unable to get it off your mind?
  • Have you experienced a sudden weight loss or gain recently? Loss of appetite? Sleeping difficulties?
  • Have you experienced difficulty concentrating or an inability to focus on the task at hand?
  • Have you experienced prolonged feelings of hopelessness and despair?
  • Have you begun to use alcohol or other drugs excessively, perhaps to self-medicate?
  • Have you noticed a decrease in your patience and ability to manage frustration and an increase in the frequency and intensity of anger?
  • Have you noticed a change in any behaviors in your spouse or other close family members which trouble you?

If you answered “yes” to any of the questions, you may benefit from speaking with a professional Christian counselor.

How do I know if I need counseling?
Many people avoid counseling as if it is a disease or a prison sentence. The truth is that trained counselors can be very effective at helping you sort through any issue that is plaguing you. If you had a constant pain in your abdomen, chances are you would visit a doctor if it lasted more than a day or two. Your emotional and mental health is just as important. If you don’t know whether you need a counselor you can ask yourself some important questions (see sidebar). These may help you determine if counseling is appropriate for your situation. You can also call our Counseling Department and share your situation or concerns with one of our therapists to see if he or she recommends that you seek a trained professional in your area.

Can you post the counselor referral list that you reference above?
We do not post this list because not all of the counselors on the list may be appropriate for every counseling need. Some issues require a specialist while others do not. We ask people to call our Counseling Department directly so we can find out the nature of the problem and provide an informed referral based on each person’s specific needs. Our experience tells us that if people are not properly matched to a counselor and have a bad experience, they may never again return for the help they need. We have structured our process to try to eliminate as many obstacles to recovery as we can.

What if I am not Christian? Can you refer me to a non-Christian counselor?
Our services are for Christians and non-Christians alike—our heart is to help as many people as possible. Because we believe that the spiritual aspect of our lives plays a crucial part in mental and emotional health, we only recommend Christians who have gone through our screening process. We urge you to consider contacting the Christian counselor available in your area and frankly and openly discuss your faith situation with him or her. Counselors are obligated to not impose their own beliefs on their clients, so it may be worth talking with the counselor to determine if he or she can still provide relevant help for you. Even if you do not choose a Christian counselor, you can learn practical tips on how to find a counselor that is right for you by reading Guidelines for Selecting a Counselor.

Do you recommend or endorse 12-step programs to free people from sexual addiction?
As a rule we do not recommend any programs, but limit our referrals to individual therapists we have personally screened. We would, however, support an individual’s decision to attend such a group if it were recommended by a trained Christian counselor they are seeing who was familiar with the local group and how it was conducted.

There are a number of other programs available for people struggling with pornography, sex addiction, and affairs. Why don’t you link to them on your site?
As we stated earlier, we do not refer people to specific programs, only specific therapists whom we have screened. The difficulty of endorsing an entire organization or program is that leaders or therapists connected with such programs may change frequently, bringing changes to the program, its materials, or its philosophy. It would be impossible for us to maintain an accurate knowledge of every group’s status.

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